Love Across The Deep Blue: Airports

Airports. The place that holds an LDR couple's dreams and nightmares.

Ever since I met Massimo, airports have been my best friends, and my worst enemies. I think that I can speak for all LDR couples when I say that they are nothing but an emotional roller coaster. It's the one place that you wait for months to step into, knowing that it will be the one thing that connects you and your partner physically. And then, after getting to be together, it's the one place that you dread the most, the place that makes you feel sick to your stomach as you're pulling up to it. Let's start with the positive side. You're away from your partner for months. The entire time, all you're thinking of is the day that you will get to pack your bags and head to the airport so that you can finally embrace each other again. You make countdowns, talk every day, send letters, and look forward to the day that you will get to step onto an airplane and fly closer to them by the second. Finally, that day comes. Everything that you have always hated about airports becomes completely invisible, because this time, the love of your life will be waiting for you at the other end. If you're on standby like me, then it becomes an extremely stressful experience since you never know if you're for sure going to be able to get on the plane. However, when you do get on the plane, you're ecstatic! All you can think about is what you are going to do when you're reunited, and the fact that the next bed you'll be sleeping in will be his/hers. If you're anything like me, you won't be able to get any sleep! The flight seems like it takes forever, much longer than the last few months that you spent apart! Every layover you have isn't that bad, because you know that you're just that much closer. Finally, you arrive. You get off the airplane, knowing that the very ground that your love walks on. You feel their presence, so close to you...and the anxiety sets in. Next thing you know, you pick up your bag from the baggage claim and you know that the time has come. It's time to step out of the big airport doors and to be greeted with the embrace that you have anticipated for months. Your stomach has butterflies, your brain is racing with thoughts of how your reunion will go over, your body is taken over by overwhelming nervous and excited feelings. All of the sudden, you walk out of the doors and you see them standing right in front of you in a crowd of people, with the largest smile on their face. You hurry over to them and jump into their arms, welcomed by the greatest and most comforting kiss that you could imagine. Suddenly, everybody around you completely disappears. It's just you two, in an infinite moment, in each others arms. Feeling each others heart beats. Touching their skin and seeing their smile. This is the moment that reminds you that the months of pain from missing each other are all completely worth it. You both giggle, knowing that you were both so nervous and are now acting so silly out of delight. You walk to the car together, hand in hand, and finally you feel complete.

Weeks spent with your love go by so much faster than you anticipated. It's now the day before you're going to leave once again and embark on your long distance journey. The entire day feels like another countdown. All you're doing is counting down the hours, and reminding yourself that at the same time the very next day, you will be separated once again. You try so hard to keep these thoughts out of your mind, however no matter what, they continue to haunt you. Tears come randomly, although you're trying to keep your heart strong. Every look you take into your partner's eyes is that of comfort, but also complete sadness, since you know that you only have so much longer to be able to do so. You just want to grab a hold of them and never ever have to be told to let go. You don't want to have to deal with that final embrace. You have to pack your entire bag, as they sit there and accompany you to make sure that you're staying strong, while you both know that you're both seconds from breaking down.That night you want to stay up as late as possible, because you know that when you wake up it will be time to go. However, you both know you have to go to bed since it's a long day for the both of you tomorrow. You embrace each other as you fall asleep and hold each other as tight as possible, hoping that you will escape into dreams and they will take you to a new reality. The morning comes anyway. Everything seems pretty rushed. You shower, dress, finish up your bags, grab extra snacks, get last minute flight information and before you know it, you're out the door and in the car. You both try to listen to music to make yourselves feel better, and your hands grasp tightly. For some reason, you both don't speak much; you only appreciate the feeling of being together in your last moments. You want the car ride to last as long as possible. You hope for traffic, fog, bad weather...so that you can either miss your flight, or that the plane can't take off. Anything that will prolong your time together. The airport comes into view, and your heart sinks. Just weeks before, you had greeted each other and left together on one of the happiest days of your life. Now the day is the complete opposite, and you will both be leaving alone. You go up to the counter and get completely checked in, and now you just wait to go into security. You find a place to sit, and you plan to leave at the last possible minute before the plane begins to board. That is the real countdown. You are both looking at the clock, watching it tick. You're trying to keep each other's spirits high by reminding each other that it won't be that long, and comparing the time apart to all the other times, trying to make it seem easier. You might share a couple of laughs, and moments of silence where you just want to be in each other's arms. The time comes to walk to the security line. Your stomach twists itself into a deep and painful knot. You go through security together, walking as slowly as possible. Once again, the people around you disappear. And it's just you two, trying to keep it together in your last minutes. Then, the point comes where they can't go any farther. You pull to the side, and jump into their arms. This is where you break down, where you feel the most weak. Where you just don't want to say goodbye...where you hope for any last miracle. You know that the time has to come, however you push it as long as you possibly can. You give tons of kisses and give an extremely hard embrace, and take a look into their eyes. You exchange positive words, and many many tears. They dip under the belt and are now on the other side, and you take one final squeeze over their hands. They wait there while you continue into security, and all you're doing is just staring at them. You could care less about everybody else that may be looking at you in that moment, because all that matters is that you're still able to stare into their eyes. You go through security and once you get everything together, you take one last long glance, drop a couple more tears, and turn your back to walk to your gate. The second that they are out of your site, your heart drops. You feel empty and alone, and know that you have left half of your heart on the other side of security. You can't hold back the tears, and could care less that people are looking at you with wonder, pity, and concern. You board your flight, feeling completely numb and emotionally exhausted. You avoid looking at the TV the whole flight, because you don't want to have to see the animated plane going farther and farther away. All you do is try to sleep and contain your sanity and hold back your tears all the way home. When you finally land, the first thing you do is get on your phone so that you can talk to them once again. However the first time you hear their voice, it sets in reality that you are back to connecting with each other only through technology. Your family or friends pick you up from the airport and try their hardest to distract you, however you feel like nothing can fill the hole that was taken from you. And so it begins, another long distance countdown....

Sound familiar? Well, I would like to offer some advice to ease the airport pain as much as possible. On the days before you part from each other, make a list of things that you plan on doing with each other during your next visit. Count out the days that you have until you will see each other again, and reassure each other that it will indeed go by quickly, especially if it's less time than you have had to deal with before. Talk about fun things you guys will get to do together, and how you are going to make them work. Remind each other of the things that you both will have to do while apart, and how that will make time go by faster since you will both be busy. If you have some time to spare, make homemade jars and decorate each other's with words or designs that will make you partner smile. Then, go buy a bag of your favorite small candies that you both like to share. (We have used both Jolly Ranchers and M&Ms!) Count out the days that you will be apart, and add them to each jar. Then, eat them on Skype together each day to remind each other that it's a day closer! Always a fun thing to share, and also exciting to see the jar become empty :) Before you leave, write notes to your partner and hide it around their house, in places that they will easily find it just going about their daily routine. Or, if they are the one leaving, hide it in different places in their luggage for them to find. You will feel great knowing that they will have a smile on their face in one of the hardest times. Also, if you have a specific type of perfume/cologne that they love, spray it around their house or on their things, so that they will feel more comfortable and less lonely. This will remind them that you're with them at heart, and your smell will linger for a while. You can also make a playlist of uplifting songs that you both enjoy that will keep your spirits up while you are traveling away from each other, and also through your months apart. Leave them behind a shirt of yours or something that they can wear that will remind them of you, so that they can have it always to feel your presence when it's missing physically. You'd be surprised at how much these things can help your pain! Remember, no matter how sad you both are on your last day, make it about YOU GUYS. Take the entire time to enjoy each other and make some really amazing memories. Treat yourselves to a nice dinner or dessert, cuddle up for hours and don't let go. Do whatever feels right, just make sure that you guys are only worrying about each other, and being together. You're both hurting just as bad at this time, and both need to hear some encouraging words. Remind each other why you're in this, and that you're in it together. Remember, being connected at heart is truly what will keep you going strong during the times that you're physically apart!

I'm going to leave you with some of my own airport pictures, some happy..others not so much. We haven't taken pictures for every trip to the airport, especially the ones where it's just us two. But here are some from the moments that we have captured! I'm sure some of you will be able to relate...

Our very first goodbye